By Talia Ran
“Be with whomever you like, as long as you are happy.”
A lovely sentiment often said in reference to a person finding that special someone to marry. While that is all well and good, there is; however, some debate on whether or not it should be said to those of the Jewish faith.
A press release regarding last week’s San Francisco meeting of the Central Conference of American Rabbis announced a conceptual shift in the Reform movement’s approach to marriage.
The largest group of Jewish clergy in the world has decided rather than spend time and energy on discouraging Jews from marrying non-Jews, they will begin to focus on outreach to intermarried couples, encouraging mixed-faith couples to be active in Jewish life—including creating special blessings for major life events such as weddings and funerals.
In addition, they expect Conservative Judaism to move in a similar direction in the coming years and say even Orthodoxy will have to formulate some sort of response besides a total rejection of intermarried couples.
However, Baruch Marzel of the Nationalist group, Lehava (which means flame in Hebrew as well as being an acronym for ‘Preventing Assimilation in the Holy Land’), is quick to disagree. In a letter addressed to Israeli super model Bar Rafaeli pleading for her to not marry non-Jewish boyfriend Leonardo DiCaprio, Marzel writes:
It is not by chance that you were born Jewish. Your grandmother and her grandmother did not dream that one of their descendants would one day remove the family’s future generations from the Jewish people. Assimilation has forever been one of the enemies of the Jewish people.
While his means were bold, Marzel stated, “I’ve got to try. I’m trying any way I can. I tried to call her, but she wouldn’t answer, so I sent her a letter instead.”
This is not the first time Marzel has made such a fervent plea in the name of maintaining future Jewish generations. In 2006, acting then as leader of the United Jewish Front, he publically wrote to Israeli model and former Miss Universe, Linor Aberjil asking her to turn down the marriage proposal from non-Jewish, Lithuanian NBA player Sarunas Jasikevicius.*
In an interview with The Jerusalem Post, Marzel cited, but refused to name, “many” examples of high-profile female Israeli celebrities who, with his help, had ended their interfaith relationships and went on to be “good religious girls.”
*Aberjil and Jasikevicius married in July 2006, but later divorced in 2008.
As a mother of three young adult children it is my Israeli husband and my hope that our children will marry Jews and carry on the tradition of our ancestors, many of whom died for their “jewishness.”
However, I would accept a non-Jew converting to Judiasm and growing our population. The more the merrier!
Hi all, I just want to share some facts about marriage:
1. The divorce rate among couples where the woman makes more than the man is 50% higher than among couples in which the husband earns more.
2. There are 25,000 to 35,000 polygynous marriages in the U.S.,mostly in western states.
The more polygynous the mating system the greater the differences between the sexes in terms of mortality.
Some thoughts on your article. It seems to me that it is quite a request for one member of the couple to ask the other to give up his or her religion, and quite confusing for the children to have a mother one religion and the father , another. Of course, if one member of the couple has no religion, he or she might be searching and benefit from conversion. Some of our most contributing Jews are converts and we must welcome then with open arms.
But, this is a very big step for one to decide to convert and much thought must be given to such a step.